My Right Name

by Lupa J

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    My Right Name EP, CD edition! Gatefold card case, four panels of artwork designed by Lupa J.

    Includes unlimited streaming of My Right Name via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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03:42
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03:40
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01:31
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02:36
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credits

released July 15, 2016

Written, recorded and produced by Lupa J
Mixed by Tim Whitten
Mastered by Studios 301

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all rights reserved

about

Lupa J Sydney, Australia

18 year old classically trained violinist turned indie electronic song maker.

I write, record & produce all my own music. I also make music videos - you can watch them on my youtube channel: www.youtube.com/user/officiallupamusic

Like my Facebook page for news & updates: www.facebook.com/lupajmusic

Contact:
lupajmgmt@gmail.com
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Track Name: Numb
Look into yourself
What do you not know?
Hold your hand tight
Don't let go

(I can only see the silence
I can only see the empty space)

What can't you see?
What's holding you still?

Sear your hand in the fire
Do you feel the pain?
Your blood burning hot
A bruised black stain

Or is it all just numb?
Track Name: Game
Mouse on a wheel
Running a pretend race
synthetic, worn
Feed me enough to feel real
I won’t ask for more

Silver bars
Bend and change directions
At perfect angles;
Embrace me
In metallic affection
I don’t leave

Playing your game
All this time
I never asked why
I wanted to win

Too shy to ask
About these needles,
Electric shocks
I am the task
below ticking clocks

Grow me right
Mouth cut into thirds
Hard questions
Can’t be tried
Without words

Playing your game
All this time
I never asked why
I wanted to win
Track Name: Broken Mirrors
I close my eyes
I drift away
Feel my lungs
Rise and fall all on their own
No longer anchored to my bones

I linger behind
And watch a pair of eyes
Scan a mirror
All on their own
Like breathing;
Like they know

In the glass she blurs
Like a doll,
Tossed and turned
And I wonder
How much longer
I can just stand here
And observe

Take me by the hand
We’ll run away
Till the world is far behind
Find a land with an entry fee of a lost mind

Be free of this skin
And see the woman you never really wanted to be
Picking at yourself in the glass
Your one last plea
Oh
Is that me?

Walk the city streets with the spying walls
Where the blinking eyes have control
Someone carved them deep into the sides of your skull
It’s hard to fend them off when they’ve made the lights so dull

Tightening fists and twisted figures
Pretty faces and broken mirrors:
Those ones you never trust cos they always seem to lie
When it’s really not you that’s staring back into your eyes

Oh
But is it really the mirror who lies?
Or am I
The broken one

Take me by the hand
We’ll run away
Till the world is far behind
Find a land with an entry fee of a lost mind

Be free of this skin
And see the woman you never really wanted to be
Picking at yourself in the glass
Your one last plea
Oh
Is that me?

Oh
But is it really the mirror who lies?
Or am I
The broken one
Track Name: Philomela
I shiver
Before the world’s
Open mouth
Our words
Pinned to walls
Twisted

In shining light
You’ll see the creases on my skin
Where the blood once ran
A face picked to pieces
By its own hands

A hundred eyes
Under my skin
Stop looking at me
Like that

Safety is a room
With walls
That listen
Safety is a room
Where she holds me:

Soft hands
That know ugly touch
Her soft hands
That know ugly touch

We are the hungry eyes
That will only see so much
Track Name: Teeth and Loud Talk
Between concrete walls
Stamped beneath the black boots
Of black suits
And grey carpet floors
I breathe softly
In a room with no doors
Jam packed to the roof
With teeth and loud talk

Bent and breaking bodies
And pale empty eyes
All the people are crazy
All the people are crazy
Bent and broken bodies
And not a place to hide
All the people are crazy
All the people are crazy

Get me out of here

Long hours
Short nights
In a tighter room
We fight again
You’re my only friend
You’re going crazy
You weren’t before
You’re going crazy

Don’t leave me here
With no where to move or speak or sleep
Or breathe
You’re my only friend
I’m sorry
Maybe it’s me
Maybe I’m crazy

Like blood, my secrets
Are smeared across these walls
The faces fade
And I can’t tell
If any of it was real at all

Just get me out of here

(Like blood, my secrets
Are smeared across these walls
The faces fade
And I can’t tell
If any of it was real at all
I can't tell
If any of it's real)
Track Name: My Right Name
Under glittering lights
You drink me away
Until I am nothing
Until her blurred face
Is all you see

(The room is spinning
And you are spinning with it)

Behind tired eyes
I suck this memory dry
Until I forget the date
Until you are the face
Of all the faces that I meet

(I am sinking
and the floor is sinking with me)

I sift through
Scattered conversation
Searching for the moment
I learned to swallow my words

Was it you
Who made me like this?

Folding myself into smaller sums
Begging you to forgive
What it is I’ve become
I’ll wilt under your gaze
For years to come
So will she
And all the others
And you’ll drink us all away

Yet still
I wait for the day
Where you’ll know me
And call me by my right name

I wait
I draw blood
from empty veins